Good Enough

Hey little girl would you like some candy
Your momma said that it’s okay
The door is open come on outside
No I can’t come out today
It’s not the wind that cracked your shoulder
And threw you to the ground
Who’s there that makes you so afraid
You’re shaken to the bone
And I don’t understand
You deserve so much more than this

So don’t tell me why
He’s never been good to you
Don’t tell me why
He’s never been there for you
Don’t you know that why
Is simply not good enough
So just let me try
And I will be good to you
Just let me try
And I will be there for you
I’ll show you why
You’re so much more than good enough...



This song has both destroyed me... and picked me up in the past 10 years.


Thank you Jesus for showing me I was good enough to be Loved

A Weekly Routine

Every week I send a letter. Anonymously -- and with no return address.

Plain white envelope, typed address. A little stamp in the right hand corner.

I take it to the mailbox to have it sent on its way. Wondering when it will arrive at its destination.

Once it arrives, I don't know what's done with it. I don't know if it's loved, thrown away, forgotten, made fun of, or burned.

I know that it doesn't matter what happens to it - but that it's been sent.

Within the letter is another letter. A Letter in-fact that changes peoples lives daily.

Romans.

Upon printing the scripture, I plead with God....

Holy Spirit, plant Yourself in the letter. Open the eyes of the blind. Open the ears of the deaf. Make yourself known! Soften the steel of his heart. Let these letters show love and truth. Let them show the Gospel and the weight of You. Jesus catch him when he falls.

But Lord, if this is not your will for him, I'll be okay. I just want him to have the chance to see You like I do. God I plead with every cell inside me, Lord awake in him.



Until that day comes, I will continue my weekly routine.



Letter by Letter. Book by Book.


In Christ Alone.

Eat, Pray, Love

I read this book about 3 years ago now. I was not really at a 'sane' place in my life at that time.

Since the movie is coming out soon, I figured that I would re-read it because honestly, I don't remember what it was about at all.

So I picked it up about 2 days ago. (I haven't had much time to read in the past 2 days, so I was only on section 2) She (the Author) starts to tell about her marriage. She starts to tell about how horrible her marriage is and that she no longer wants to be apart of it. Being married, I still can't see how this makes any logical sense. She doesn't go into detail about the reasons for not wanting to be a part of the marriage anymore. Just that there were personal issues. Which I could assume most marriages face at some point or another. Nonetheless, she wants out.

She states that something changed in her that night on the floor. That she began to pray. To God. She then proceeds to state that she considers herself, "Culturally, not theologically" a Christian. UM WHAT? Then.... continues to state that she was born protestant and that she doesn't believe that Christ "the Good-teacher" is the only way to heaven. And that no one she talks/surrounds herself with says anything more strict than that. Then apologizes if anything she has said offends anybody and that they should just mind their business.

I then took the book to the kitchen. Found the trash can, and tossed it.

That is the reason why people do not take Christ and Salvation seriously.
They can leisurely say, oh yes, I'm a Christian and have no belief in the REASONS for Christianity in the first place.

I pray that one day God softens her heart and she sees that the Truth is that through Christ alone there is freedom. Until that time, I will not be reading any of her books.

Redeeming Love - A novel by Francine Rivers

So my sister Ashley gave me a book called Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers for Christmas. I will tell you right now - it is long! At first glance I could not believe how thick it was. It was going to take some time to read - and I am not a slow reader.

I kept hearing about this book, from our pastor, from the staff at church. It was calling me. I sat down and opened the cover. Determined to just finish. Who knew that the book would change me. God has this really awesome way of showing Himself to me through books. Redeeming Love is about a little girl who grows into a woman. She is broken from her childhood and the story details the devastation and heartbreak this little child goes through. From a earthy father that never wanted her, to a mother who sent her away when her father was around (who had married and had legitimate children of his own)- to being sold into prostitution and ultimately manipulated and raped as a child by grown adult men. It sickens me to think that things like this happen (The story was set in the late 1800's during the gold rush of California) even today.

Angel, in the novel, goes from man to man, to duchess to owner... finding her way to a brothel in Sacramento. She is well taken care of... as taken care of as one could be in her circumstances. She uses her femininity to please men who pay loads of gold for her time. She thinks of herself nothing more than a woman who was made to please men - as she was taught most of her life.

A man named Michael Hosea comes to town in search for a wife. Walking along the street one day, he spots Angel and all of her beauty. God has led him to her; for a reason he doesn't quite know.

He meets Angel - she is utterly turned off by him. He wants not to be pleased but to only talk with her. Ask her about her life, plead with her to leave and to marry him. She continues to push him away, but inside is torn by the possibility of a life outside of the one she knows so well. Michael makes more trips to see her and to try to make her come with him. He finally chooses to be done. To leave her since she won't budge on her decision. She fights with the duchess who then sends in her bodyguard to make Angel understand her place. Shes left almost dead from blows and beatings when Michael steps in, pays for her and takes her to his home.

He spends the next 2 years teaching her and showing her all the ways to be a woman and to stand on her own two feet. She falls in love with him slowly and with much relent. She decides the best thing for him is to leave him. To go back to town and create a life on her own, using the money that the Dutchess owes her.

Now, I won't spoil the ending. It's worth the read. But I do want to add that the entire time I was reading this God was begging me to listen. To listen intently to the words He has been trying to speak to me. To see a life that He wants for me. He continually tries to stir in my affections I have never known before.

This book was a great way for God to show me life and the love that He has for me, and the love that is possible through Christ.

Thank you Francine Rivers for that incredible book. Thank you Jesus for continually trying to turn my blindness into sight.